With the regular skipper missing due to performing an abnormal amount of brownie point collecting by actually noticing his wedding anniversary, then acting on it. The role of Skipper fell to Manoj.

 

Your humble reporter became aware that this was not going to be a normal weekend on the night before the match when he received a call from Manoj that started out ... “Hi Simon.... I’m going to be a little late tomorrow because I’m doing a course in the morning!”.

 

Now, those that have met Manoj for the first time at a match have usually done so some minutes after the official start of the match when his car arrives. Sometimes this has involved also meeting the missing half of the team at the same time. Given that this call was giving 24hrs notice it was clearly shaping up to be a “a little late” of spectacular proportions.

 

Obviously the concept of Manoj being late is not a First, however receiving a warning about it is a First. The first First of the match, there would be more and we weren’t even in the match day yet.

 

Manoj followed up this bad news with some more... “You will be vice captain, and you need to make sure that Lester gets some keepers equipment.” Okay, I could handle this.

 

Manoj then followed this with 10 minutes of carefully reasoned instructions regarding how to win the toss, what to do if we did win the toss and what to do if we didn’t win the toss. Eventually, having covered all the options and promising to follow this up with an email containing the batting order our leader signed off for the night with “Oh, and could you please write the match report as Jurgo failed to notice your first ball of the season wicket last week”. Well, actually, he didn’t say that last bit, but I couldn’t resist.

 

Saturday, the match day, dawned very grey. Quite humid conditions but clear of rain. My email inbox was stubbornly clear of any email from the Skipper. Never mind, I’d wing it. Nothing new there then.

 

Early that morning I get a text that starts “I am Noble”, I almost stop reading at this point anticipating some form of junk mail. However being bored I persisted and discovered that Manoj had, just for a change, met someone new before the game and was sending him to introduce himself early – and ask for a lift. This is the second First of the match. Looking at Nobles’ second name “George” I suspect that Manoj may just have left it a bit late introducing us.

 

It got even better when Lester announced that whilst he had obtained the keeping kit from Sloth he had no idea where to take it and play the game, having lent his SatNav to a family member for the weekend.

 

Noble and Lester came in the car with me, and after some sightseeing in deepest Berkshire, we discovered that we were the first to arrive at 12:42.

 

13:00 came and went and the Park players trickled in. No sign of Manoj, or Rajesh

 

Just after 13:15 the opposition skipper sought me out, and we strode out onto the pitch to toss a coin. Herro had previously briefed me that it didn’t count if it wasn’t done that way. I think he may be worried about players tossing too close to the changing rooms.

 

I called correctly (This is another First for me as a WPCC stand in skipper) and elected to bat. In fairness Manoj had included this choice in one part of his 10 minutes of instructions the night before, but as he’d also chosen to bowl at another point I’ll claim this as my decision on the day.

 

Noble started to receive frequent phone calls from Manoj, he then handed the phone to me and as I guided our skipper to the ground (The police were blocking the proper road. The next road was closed for re-surfacing. I don’t know where we are. I don’t know where you are. The dog ate my map... and so on) I repeated our Glorious Leaders occasional cricket related instructions for a batting order. As a result Suvo padded up along with Pawan.

 

With a final “don’t worry I’m here” his car swept into the car park just after 13:25. He was (just about) on time ( contrary to popular belief this is not, in fact, a First) – but was without Rajesh. Ah. This could be worrying.

 

As he strode into the pavilion, each time Manoj saw a WPCC bastman he chanted “You’re opening with Suvo”. By the time he’d reached the far side of the changing room we had 4 openers plus Suvo and no Rajesh. There was a short pause. And another pause. Stock was taken. Okay, Upendra was to open with Suvo. Whilst Rajesh had decided that it would rain and therefore at 11am had also decided not to join us. Which in turn explained the presence of Pradeep whom Manoj had collected from Farnborough at 12:30. This also explained some his weirder choices of route selection.

 

As is now customary for bowlers I take first stint as Umpire with Andy Cale and off we go. Ignoring Suvo’s pleas for “only a few more“ practice deliveries WPCC take the field only 2 minutes late.

 

Upendra starts steadily and deliberately with a sweetly struck 4. In the next over Suvo also strikes with an almighty swing. Apparently it was a strike at something near the end of his toes, possibly a wasp, and not at the ball. His wicket disintegrates. Quack. This is the First quack of the day – it was not to be the last.

 

Pawan steadies the ship, and he and Upendra bring the core along nicely until they start hitting over the top and the field spreads out. Inevitably Pawan is out caught, for 34 with the score on 59 in the 14th over.

 

Manoj and Upendra continue to press on and push the score to 89 in the 20th when Upendra is also caught. He’d scored 24.

 

Noble then proves that he knows which end of the bat to hold, and scores a steady and controlled 36 before falling in the 35th over with the score at 148. This was Nobles’ First batting performance for WPCC.

 

Bala went Quack off the next ball and we were seeing the familiar sight of Manoj standing at the crease with a variety of batting partners briefly stopping for a chat before departing to the hutch.

 

Lester went out and stayed. The overs ticked away. Meanwhile Skipper was telling the umpire nearest the hutch to change the batting order. Updendra nodded sagely and failed to do anything about it for a while. Although at one part he did yell loudly at a wandering WSL boundary fielder. Instructing him to go and pad up as he’s going in to bat next. Eventually the message was mixed up a bit and sort of filtered through to the waiting Park batsmen.

 

With the core on 170 for 5 in the 41st over Manoj was on 49 when he edged a ball so finely past the keeper for 2 that all watching assumed it was really a pair of unsignalled byes. This is not uncommon with our umpires. Skipper was therefore denied a round of applause for his 50. Perhaps miffed by this he too managed to get caught out a couple of balls later.

 

Passing Pradeep on the outfield he asked “Where’s Simon?” Clearly the batting line-up message had been altered a little before reaching the hutch. He followed this with “we need some runs”, which might not have been a good idea. Quack.

 

Your humble reporter strides out with the same message following him. Clean bowled attempting to hit over long on in the 42nd over. Quack.

 

Time for a change of tack.

 

Mike Carter, with some more stable instructions goes in and would finish Not Out on 2.

 

Lester is bowled for 11 with the score still on 172 in the 43rd and Andy Cale manages 2 more runs before also being bowled.

 

That’s Park 178 all out on the last ball of the 44th over. Five wickets for 6 runs might just be a new Park batting collapse record. Although, sadly, I suspect that it isn’t.

 

 

 

Oh goody, we had an extra over in which to bowl them all out. On a drying track with damp air this should be easy for our group of fast bowlers.

 

 

 

During tea (heavily based on some large collections of big triangular sandwiches and cakes – and very tasty) Our Leader instructs his bowlers that we’d be bowling in 3 over spells to avoid the batsmen getting used to our deliveries. It was pointed out that this was also about the time that our bowlers were getting used to their own deliveries and the plan changed again.

 

Our Leader decides to take the old ball. This is relatively unusual and there’s a quick moment of panic from our hosts until its location is discovered. Park make a slightly laden trip onto the pitch, and Manoj opens with Upendra from the northern end. With the pace of Pradeep at the south. This was the First key bowling decision.

 

Every chance he gets Upendra runs the ball along the ground, or throws into the ground, or wipes it on the ground. Then every chance he gets Pradeep polishes the rapidly worsening scuffs off the ball and tries desperately to dry it out.

 

After 7 overs Upendra has settled in and has taken two wickets in his last two overs, bowling one opener and having their number three caught. Manoj needs to be persuaded not to take the new ball whist Upendra is working his magic. This was the Second key bowling decision.

 

During this period Suvo discovers that he wants to be best mates with the WSL SL umpire, and Our Leader starts sending Suvo to various, steadily more distant, fielding positions. Until Suvo could once again concentrate on the game at hand.

 

At a couple of points during the cycle through various fielding positions this created the sight of Suvo running for the ball, and once he even chased it down near the boundary. There was some discussion amongst the new hands about whether this might be another First in a day of many Firsts. However the more experienced amongst us still remember the summer of 2008, and could comfortably say that it has happened before.

 

As the 14th over drew to a close Manoj was faced with a growing dilemma. Manoj was now almost determined to bowl only with the old ball. It had finally yielded to the Upendra treatment and was turning into a squishy lemon and Upendra was steadily taking wickets with some absolutely brilliant bowling. However Upendra was running out of overs.

 

Manoj had been reminded in the 13th over that in his enthusiasm for captaining a team largely discovered by himself, his instructions were completely unintelligible to those not born on the sub-continent. I suspect that at this point he realised that three of the four concerned players (the fourth was holding the gloves) were ostensibly fast bowlers, and that we’d really quite like to take part at some point. Preferably before the stumps were pulled. Preferably bowling something hard and shiny, and capable of doing some harm to the stumps.

 

Manoj decided to take the new ball at the end of Upendra’s 8th over. At they start of the 16th over. This would prove a turning point in the match and was the Third major bowling decision.

 

Mike Carter had replaced Pradeep who had struggled with the soft old thing for seven overs, 2 maidens for 1 wicket yielding 14 runs. Andy Cale came on to replace Upendra who looked progressively more bored now.

 

Noble came on to replace Mike after his four overs, 1 maiden, 1 wicket for 14 runs. Nice tidy bowling Mike.

 

Andy carried on for 5, no maidens or wickets for 29 runs before being replaced by your reporter.

 

Towards the end of my first over from the northern end, with Noble firing away nicely at the southern end something happened that I didn’t see clearly.

 

It was reported later that Upendra produced a telephone as if by magic, and tried to either place or take a call. Our Leader didn’t like the idea of this happening on the pitch and then Upendra asked to leave the pitch to take/make the call.

 

It was pointed out to Manoj by the team that 10 normal plus one bored fielders are better than 10 fielders.

 

It was pointed out to Manoj by the umpires that once off he’d have to wait as many overs after returning as he’d been absent from the pitch before bowling.

 

Somehow Manoj persuade Upendra to not use the phone and stay on the pitch. This negotiation possibly hastened the end of Nobles’ spell. 2 overs for 10 runs.

 

Now with Edwards knocking over some stumps for his First clean bowled wicket of the season and finding some extreme if rather erratic swing. Upendra came on from the southern end for his final spell.

 

A lesson in controlled aggression saw Upendra pick off the bails of three of the opposition who couldn’t read the spin and the win was Parks by 41 runs.

 

Upendra batted superbly for many overs for his 24 Runs. Upendra bowled magnificently for 13.3 overs, 4 maidens, 7 wickets for only 28 runs. The First seven wicket haul for the 2nds in 2011.

 

Blue Stripe Moments of the day could go to many people, Rajesh for thinking it was going to rain and abandoning us match. Our Leader for having five opening bats. However for the twin events of loudly trying to persuade an opposition fielder to pad up and play for us, also for both taking a phone onto the pitch and actually trying to use it. The Blue Stripe Award for WPCC 2’s this week goes to the player who also takes the Man Of The Match award, Upendra.

 

Roll on Sandhurst at home next weekend.